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Melissa Jane Lee

Becoming the Person You Want to Be at University

Last updated: September 22, 2026

University has a funny way of making you question almost everything about yourself. You arrive thinking you know who you are, what you like, how you dress, who your friends will be and maybe even what you want to do with the rest of your life, and then suddenly you’re surrounded by hundreds of people who seem to have completely different ideas about what their own lives should look like.

A woman sits on a bed organizing papers, with a laptop, backpack, calculator, and stationery spread around her.

Somewhere between lectures, late-night conversations, deadlines, questionable cafeteria food and spontaneous plans, you start changing without even really noticing it.

That’s probably one of the best things about university.

It’s not just a place to collect a degree. It’s a period of life where you get to figure out what actually feels like you, rather than simply continuing to be the person you were at school.

Even the little details can become part of that process. Take university fashion, for example. The clothes and accessories you choose aren’t going to determine who you become, obviously, but they can be a fun way of exploring your personality while you’re figuring everything else out.

An accessory such as an Irish Jeff cap can have that effortless, slightly vintage feel that works surprisingly well with everyday campus outfits, especially when you want something casual without looking completely thrown together.

Traditionally associated with Irish-inspired casualwear, Jeff caps have a distinctive rounded, structured shape that gives them more character than an ordinary baseball cap, while wool, tweed and textured fabrics can make them particularly suited to autumn and winter wardrobes.

They work with jeans and trainers, oversized coats, knitwear or even a more polished outfit when you want to add something unexpected. ShamrockGift offers Irish Jeff caps among its Irish-inspired accessories, making them an easy detail to incorporate if your university wardrobe leans towards classic pieces with a bit of heritage character.

But the real university glow-up has very little to do with looking different.

It’s about becoming more comfortable with who you are.

Stop Trying to Have a Perfect Identity

There’s a strange expectation that by a certain age, you’re supposed to have everything figured out. University can make that feeling even stronger because suddenly everyone is talking about careers, internships, relationships, travel plans and what they’re supposedly going to do after graduation.

Meanwhile, you might still be wondering what you want for dinner.

And that’s completely fine.

You don’t need a perfectly defined identity at twenty, twenty-one or any other age. You’re allowed to change your mind. You can discover that the subject you thought you loved isn’t actually for you, become interested in something completely unexpected or realise that the version of success you imagined when you were younger doesn’t really appeal to you anymore.

Growing into yourself is rarely a straight line.

Pay Attention to What Makes You Feel Like Yourself

One of the easiest ways to understand yourself better is to notice the things that consistently make you feel good, calm, excited or genuinely interested.

Maybe you love getting dressed up for university even when everyone else is wearing hoodies. Maybe you feel happiest sitting in the library with a coffee and a book, or maybe your favourite part of the week is meeting friends after class and talking about absolutely everything except university.

None of these things are insignificant.

They’re clues.

The same goes for personal style. Experimenting with clothes, accessories, hairstyles or even completely different aesthetics can be a surprisingly useful way of working out what feels authentic. You might try a trend because everyone online seems obsessed with it and then realise it really isn’t your thing. Or you might accidentally find an outfit combination that suddenly feels completely right.

That’s how personal style develops: through trying things, keeping what works and quietly abandoning what doesn’t.

Choose People Who Let You Be Yourself

University friendships can be complicated because you’re meeting so many different people at once, and there can be a temptation to hold onto friendships simply because you don’t want to feel alone.

But becoming the person you want to be also means noticing how you feel around other people.

The right friendships shouldn’t require you to constantly edit yourself. You should be able to laugh at stupid things, talk seriously when something matters, change your opinion without being mocked and have your own interests without feeling like you need permission to have them.

And sometimes, growing means accepting that certain friendships were right for one chapter but aren’t right for the next one.

That can feel uncomfortable, but it’s also part of becoming an adult.

Don’t Turn Your Life Into a Competition

University can sometimes feel like a giant comparison machine. Someone has a better internship. Someone else travels constantly. Someone seems to have an enormous friend group, perfect grades and an impossibly organised life.

Social media makes it even easier to forget that you’re usually comparing your ordinary Tuesday with someone else’s carefully selected highlights.

Your university experience doesn’t have to look impressive from the outside to be meaningful.

Maybe your biggest achievement this year is becoming more independent. Maybe you finally learn how to manage your money, become better at setting boundaries or simply stop apologising for needing rest.

Those things matter too.

Give Yourself Room to Change

The person you want to become probably isn’t some completely transformed version of yourself waiting at the end of university.

They’re being built gradually, through ordinary decisions.

The way you speak to yourself after making a mistake. The people you choose to spend time with. The interests you allow yourself to explore. The boundaries you learn to set. The courage it takes to try something new when you’re not sure how it will turn out.

Because becoming the person you want to be at university isn’t really about creating a new identity.

It’s about giving yourself enough freedom to discover the one that was already there.

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About Melissa Jane Lee

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